15 minutes ago with 145,527 notes | reblog



So… I was giving some jelly to my cat


My phone started ringing. Forgetting that I was holding the spoon I took the phone.

I never heard the spoon hitting the floor…



they are evolving

(via headbutting)

2 hours ago with 97,805 notes | reblog

3 hours ago with 153,198 notes | reblog

4 hours ago with 156,817 notes | reblog

  • EUROPE: Why the fuck are we always getting sick? Is it demons? Is it ghosts? Is it a curse?
  • EVERYBODY ELSE: Have you tried washing your ass?

6 hours ago with 156 notes | reblog



A relationship is like a house

If a lightbulb goes out, you don’t buy a new house, you just change the lightbulb.

Unless that house is a lying whore

Then you burn the fucker to the ground and buy a better house with lights that you can fucking count on.

This took the best possible turn.

(via thestorys0-lame)